A Tale of Two Seasons
Posted August 23, 2016
Well, this was an unusually long time between news reports. I apologize. I was busy getting pleasured by my Ginger harem. I'm sure you all understand how time-consuming that can be. It was mostly wonderful....except when Rob did that thing with the squirrel....that poor, poor squirrel.
Anyway, SPORTS!!! So, another summer ball season is over. Spaceballs: The Threepeat, came up a little short, but it was still another good run and a blast to be along for the ride (at least when I wasn't busy getting thoroughly Gingered). It was a very streaky season with long periods of losing followed by long periods of winning and the team just couldn't quite pull off the comeback in the semi-final. Highlight of the season was winning the June tourney and some pretty sweet hoodies.Lowlight of the season was captain Dark Monkey getting out-homered by a different kind of monkey, a Skroob, and MegaMerMaid's wife. The Schwartz was not with him this year. Actually, the team's overall power numbers were down (I'll throw up some more career stats soon).
The fall season has just started and a similar power outage is unlikely with the return of the Milkshake and the introduction of Jason "Beautiful Handwriting" Walmsley (seriously, you should see the writing on the envelope he gave me with his team fees). Maybe the fall team can pick up the summer team's slack this year. If they do, then I think it'll be safe to blame all the summer woes on Donaskroob.
Here are the final stats for the summer season. This website gets messed up every time we switch divisions and it's a pain in the ass to get the league to update it. Instead I did everything in Excel.
| Player | AB | PA | H | R | K | BB | 1B | 2B | 3B | HR | RBI | SAC | G | Slug | OB% | AVG | OPS | FC |
| Angela Vickery | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0 |
| Ben Vickery | 70 | 80 | 48 | 28 | 0 | 9 | 29 | 13 | 4 | 2 | 35 | 1 | 29 | 1.071 | 0.713 | 0.686 | 1.784 | 7 |
| Heather Beattie | 76 | 80 | 28 | 20 | 7 | 3 | 25 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 1 | 28 | 0.408 | 0.388 | 0.368 | 0.795 | 9 |
| Jeff Pinchin | 52 | 60 | 20 | 12 | 7 | 8 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 24 | 0.404 | 0.467 | 0.385 | 0.871 | 3 |
| Joel Jamieson | 66 | 72 | 35 | 18 | 3 | 4 | 28 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 19 | 2 | 26 | 0.636 | 0.542 | 0.530 | 1.178 | 7 |
| Jordan Levine | 29 | 37 | 13 | 16 | 3 | 8 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 16 | 0.552 | 0.568 | 0.448 | 1.119 | 3 |
| Justin Danielson | 91 | 93 | 59 | 38 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 18 | 15 | 8 | 52 | 1 | 31 | 1.440 | 0.645 | 0.648 | 2.085 | 7 |
| Lauren Donahue | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 1 |
| Matt Donahue | 95 | 100 | 54 | 39 | 1 | 4 | 38 | 11 | 1 | 4 | 34 | 1 | 31 | 0.832 | 0.580 | 0.568 | 1.412 | 12 |
| Mel Morison | 98 | 99 | 45 | 30 | 2 | 1 | 32 | 5 | 6 | 2 | 28 | 0 | 31 | 0.694 | 0.465 | 0.459 | 1.159 | 10 |
| Mer Johner | 67 | 82 | 18 | 14 | 6 | 12 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 3 | 30 | 0.269 | 0.366 | 0.269 | 0.635 | 12 |
| Mike Johnson | 63 | 65 | 43 | 20 | 0 | 2 | 23 | 14 | 5 | 1 | 33 | 0 | 25 | 1.111 | 0.692 | 0.683 | 1.803 | 4 |
| Rob Timlick | 105 | 111 | 70 | 46 | 2 | 4 | 46 | 18 | 6 | 0 | 37 | 2 | 34 | 0.952 | 0.667 | 0.667 | 1.619 | 6 |
| Ryan Birdsell | 57 | 61 | 32 | 10 | 2 | 3 | 29 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 1 | 23 | 0.614 | 0.574 | 0.561 | 1.188 | 9 |
| Ryan McDougall | 87 | 94 | 53 | 36 | 1 | 7 | 49 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 33 | 0.678 | 0.638 | 0.609 | 1.316 | 11 |
| Shawna McKenzie | 75 | 76 | 24 | 12 | 7 | 1 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 19 | 0 | 27 | 0.320 | 0.329 | 0.320 | 0.649 | 7 |
| TOTALS | 1035 | 1114 | 542 | 339 | 41 | 67 | 388 | 101 | 37 | 17 | 339 | 12 | 390 | 0.743 | 0.547 | 0.524 | 1.290 | 108 |
| PITCHING | ||||||||||||||||
| Player | G | W | L | T | GS | CG | SHO | IP | R | ER | BB | BB/G | K | K/G | K/BB | ERA |
| Ben Vickery | 5 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 22.33 | 67 | 50 | 5 | 1.0 | 5 | 1.0 | 1.0 | 11.20 |
| Rob Timlick | 34 | 15 | 19 | 0 | 34 | 34 | 1 | 155 | 310 | 210 | 5 | 0.1 | 48 | 1.4 | 9.6 | 6.77 |
| TOTALS | 39 | 16 | 23 | 0 | 39 | 39 | 1 | 177.33 | 377 | 260 | 10 | 0.3 | 53 | 1.4 | 5.3 | 7.33 |
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