May 30/23
9:20 pm

Off-Season Hermit



Virginia Madison:
You're Not Invited

Player of the week:
(Aug 31/06)
Conway and Bute have no friends, they aren't even friends themselves

Bute and Conway learned just how much they hate each other while spending a week at Conways cabin on Canim lake. F-you Conway
Countdown to Seeing Bute again
(Aug 12/06)
Conway has no clue of the 4 month hiatus that bute speaks about. A fan of credit, obviously, but there's no recall of this occurence. Butes obviously is some dream world he actually had people that miss him. Or, thAt he went somewhere for that long and did something constructive. He's also delusional that some dumb broad actually gave him the chance to release his sead in her. That's very unlikely. Even more unlikely is super sour bute had found someone tolerable enough to make that happen with. He's far to of a bitter old man to meet someone new and seal the deal. Bute has finally made his triumphant return to the mainland, and was extremely happy to learn that nobody missed him over the past 4 months while he was gone. In fact Conway was the only one of his "friends" that even knew he was gone. Bute has an uncanny way of blending into his environment and go un-noticed by society, this is fine with Bute as he wants no part of society himself. The only thing Bute has contributed to society in the last 5 years was the illegitimate kid that turned out not to be his. Bute had his boat packed and was ready to batman if the child was indeed his. Bute can't even take care of himself let alone some weak half version of himself.

Conway is unsure of the last write up previous to this one. He thought Sunny Bute wrote it but then some familiarty arose and believes the 3rd and 4th sentence were altered by the man above, and I don't mean god. I mean Bute, figure it out.

Ya, it's pretty tough to have fun when you aren't dominating, especially on here. Bute hits his 2nd bomb of the season in a playoff game. He could get away with writing on here, Chris Dowsley cannot. The page-name has been changed and his writes revoked as a standard writer. He may get the nod when he has something good to say. Conway isn't sure about his year end stats this year, he'll confirm them after PG, as they aren't anywhere close to the year before after Burnaby getting 6 hits in one inning off him. Monday is a depressing day for Rich Conway, he's got Chris Dowsley to thank for that.

Dowsley was shocked to see his password was still valid after his Wednesday outing. He cannot say anything as he has lost his right, due to his WHIP now being over 6.

If Conway could only learn how to pitch to Jake Dojack and his followers. If Dojack was allowed to play on every team Conway throws against in a given year then he'd probably go re-take up wrestling. But then of course Dojack would catch word of this and do the same and ultimately cheat Conway of his C-grade life. Dojack has made Conway fear the upcoming weekend and has given no choice to the Angels coaching staff but to sit Conway out when they play the Budgies. The only bright side of Conway's previous outing was the K's he piled up and the new change up he figured out how to throw. He will thorw a pen this week to improve it as much as possible for the upcoming few weeks.
Jason Swan has made Conway reconsider his plans to go up to Prince George and beyond. Jason Swan also justified Conway's BS-L on the weekend to there being no way of ending the season on a 15 game winning streak. Conway had thought about this and taking it into his own arm purposely losing to set up the play off sched. However the only way this played itself out was if it was done subconsciously.
What stops Conway from going to PG is the heart-wrenching decision to once again let done his true counterpart. However, he has no problem in selling out the entire league to depart to OK North during Westerns. This has nothing to do with spite, it's simply vacation time BlTCH.
Finally, there is no way the site name is changing due to the amount of crying done by the site benefactor.

If Dowsely thinks he threw well against Richmond last week then that's his problem. If Dowsely is happy with pretty standard mediocrity then enjoy your average stats. On the other hand, Conway wishes he was Dowsely as he was able to watch Conway throw a beauty and then blow it after 20 outs. The only upside to the blow-job he gave to RJ Pearce with 2 outs was he got to make an annonymous player look as bad as Francisco Liriano would, facing Kyle Iwata. The splitty is back. Sorry Smallwood but your splitter ain't that good....No matter, Smalls hung 'em up anyways. Conway really hopes the opposing starter in the aforementioned game doesn't think he out-dueled Conway. Only one player beat Conway, he also enjoys shutting teams out in tournament finals on long weekends and getting pulled in the mean time. It's assumed others know his limitations because it's pretty basic that this guy is invinceable through Conway's highly above average eyes.
It's uncertain if Dowsely is getting all over Conway for a one-time spelling error of his last name. If that's the case I wouldn't worry, Mrs. Dowsely cringes everytime she has to acknowledge her new addtion to her name. And for god's sake, teach your f[_]cking kid how to spell it. 5-1 odds says he won't want to.
Smallwood---same area code? Kelowna, Trail, Powell River, Campbell River, Gibsons. So were the f[_]ck was he? Figure it out.

First and Foremost.......Conway's future wife?????? Please let's not tarnish the credibilty of this site. That is an outright lie, this will never happen. Although, Dowsley(pls note spelling for those with sub 72mph fastballs) didn't witness any events of the "July-long", Freddy Smallwood was apparently more effective than Conway, just because he was in the same area code.......I'm not showing up......Leave your sandles on Conway.......You're 4th. The only thing putting Conway in the 4th relief spot was the absence of Dowsley. Conway is coming to the realization that he must work hard to maintain his craft......He is discouraged by Dowsley's ability to not throw in a month and still throw well. This does not happen for Conway. This will not continue to be an option for Dowsley if he keeps packing them on as he is. Conway, is looking out for Dowsley by limiting the amount of Pop-corn intake occuring on Conway's watch. Dowsley thanks Conway.

What can be said about the july-long. Superb golf, watching every other pitcher on the staff throw better than him and drinking a little too much. Puking at the picnic table while play heads-up with Shoey and then resuming the game as if nothing out of the ordinary happened. Conway openly welcomes Ryan Price to cheat on Conway's future wife. He'll understand why. There's a few people that should end their '06 campaign as quickly as possible, however one of them thinks he's still got a chance and maybe pride plays a role, and the other, well, figure it out, you suck.

Dowsely can feel free to go hang himself with his kids soap on a rope. Mix in an outing. Not much can be said since he can't give good enough head to get a start. (hint: maybe Ed's a giver.)

Chris Dowsely needs to go take the CISY 110 at Douglas College to relearn how to use his email account, preferably how to compose and send an email. Figure it out. Conway won't even mention how Dowsely got absolutely lit up on Sunday afternoon. One can ask him about it and he'll say how there was an error to start off the inning and the 4 runs were unearned...Who cares? Were the 6 hits after the error unearned as well? Is there a stat for that Dowsely? 1IP 6H 1R 0ER, that's impressive. One other thing that won't be mentioned is how Dowsely punks out on invitations handed out to him in plenty of advanced time.

This should turn into the Chris Dowsely hate-page. What is he doing? By the way this has only to do with baseball so anything taken personally is not any administrators fault. He just can't get the job done. He has 2.2 IP and obviously no starts. Kurtis Shoemaker has already exceeded Dowsely in IP and his spot on the staff. However, all of this doesn't really matter since Schafer is coming back from UBC and will take whatever innings he feels like...."No, Conway isn't pitching today....Gauthier...**** that, I'm throwing." That's how it's gonna be. Rich Conway issues a challenge to Chris Dowsely. <-take my spot.>

That other administrator has ****ed off for the summer. What will Conway do now with his summer?

Chris Dowsely should hang em up. He does absolutely nothing to get ready for the season, Surrey will light him up, Conway can't wait to witness this. Fingers are crossed that he does move to edmonton. Conway discovers that a certain big wig of the league wants nothing to do with him. This is thanks to an old member of the administration team of Rick Squid. Conway has come to realize this as he knows what team he plays for and what jersey he only wears. He can't see himself being a 'best friend' anytime soon and has to live with that everyday. Expect this site to make a small come back and then fizzle off by mid summer.

Conway finished the year 6-3 1.46ERA 1.03WHIP 72IP 63H 15ER 52K 11BB. On the other hand, Bute was too much of a coward after he went in a 0 for 18 slump. His last game he went 1-3 with an rbi triple as it was his 3rd hit and last at bat of the season. *His 1st 2 hits came on the same day: opening day. His only upside was that he hit behind Iwata, Mitchell, Eskildsen and Tosoni, which was when this once fierce lineup had a clue in hitting approaches. On an end note, Bute had 3 hits from April 17 - May 10. Iwata started off the year in getting on base 70% percent ot the time in the 1st 8 games or so. After that - guaranteed out. Other than that, Chris Dowsely handed over the #1 position to the obvious by forgetting how to throw the ball over 79mph. It's believed that his ERA went from 1.70 after 5 starts to 3.5 after 2 more. Dowsely likes to call that "shelled." Conway likes to call that "considering retirement." Conway also feels very high and mighty as he has a voice.

Conway has a dismal life. He lacks everything that all of you happy people have. He can easily say that Sunny Bute has a better life than he does. Conway is a solid hermit.

The Site is back:

If Conway thinks he can move into Bute's boat and not pick up groceries when it is clearly his turn, then he is in for a huge suprise when Bute sinks his own boat for no other reason then to **** over the waste of life now sleeping in the "living room." Bute is fully willing be become homeless in order to **** over his fiancee. Bute's not sure how Conway will read this update due to his complete ignorance when it comes to all things computer. The piece of **** who has been lit up his last two starts couldn't figure out how to plug in Bute's laptop the other day in order to charge the battery. Get your life together, Bute is suprised the kid was able to even open his measly 2 litre jug of milk he bought. Hey Conway, pay the extra dollar and get a 4 litre meat. Conway has also been runninghismouth lately over the obscene amount of money the guy makes at his job, but at the same time this waste didn't even have enough money to pick up a case of beer. Remember that part in Boiler room, about being *******-rich. And I'm not refering to this should-of-been aborted fetuses first name. FIGURE IT OUT!

this site had its moments when it was dominating:

Bute: >> Conways dad is so ashamed of his far lesser son that he won't even let this eye-sore go near the family business that pays for Conways upstairs bedroom that is located across the hall from his parents so that when they start hitting it Conway can listen in on something he'll never experience again in his lonely life. (Get a longer sentance!) Because of this Conway is forced to work 2 jobs (Showing people where the ketchup is located, and raking their lawns after they find the ketchup) in order to scrape enough cash together to get his new jeans hemmed at below the belt. this, along with still living at home, and having a younger ex-girlfriend, is just more proof that Conway has yet to, and probably never will, grow the **** up! Bute is gunna knock your teeth out you ugly ****!

Conway: >> Conway thinks it's pretty basic that Bute has to make a 2nd appearance out of the pen for some short-relief against the A&W girl. Conway would fully dose up and hand over the keys to the burb so he can get the job done on her 15 minute break. With this in mind, it's also pretty basic that once she's back on shift, she's gonna hear about it from Conway until she freaks out and gets fired and has her life temporary ruined in all thanks to the founders of The Rick. However, it might turn out to be a little more permanent when she figures out that Bute's condom 'accidentally' had a hole in it.

Conway assumes that Bute is jealous of Conway's better lifestyle. Bute's boat is so gross inside that Conway couldn't live in it after living in his dad's pimp house. Conway's dad's good food, his lexus, his tundra, his pure bread golden retriever and pretty much anything else that Conway wants, Conway gets. And Bute has none of this. All Bute has is a hot girlfriend, but that's not really gonna matter in a month or two. Conway makes Bute's decisions for him...figure it out. Back to the boat: it's repulsive. The cat obviously owns it. The thing ****ing stinks. There was no way Conway would have slept in that mess-on-water. What else does Bute not possess? -Balls. He picks a fight with a bunch of Frenchies and then as soon Conway gets agressive, Bute gets up and Conway was about to follow suit and challenge these french ****s. But Conway didn't have to go to the bathroom so he didn't need to stand up. Instead Conway had no choice but to tip glasses with these Eiffel Tower pansies as he is thinking how much **** Bute must have had to wipe up from his boxers as he was about to get into a fight that didn't take place in a sandbox. Even though Bute is far more attractive than Conway is every physical aspect that a girl looks for, Conway wouldn't trade lives with Bute any day. Good looks for being small club is the worst trade off in Conway's eyes. And then there's the whole CSI vs. UVIC thing and Bute's 1st year on Douglas doesn't even need to be mentioned. Don't worry Bute, you'll be getting free tickets to The Nat all summer.

Bute is the only thing Conway can get all over as no girl wants anything to do with Conway or his un-fore-skined ****. Seriously what kind of man doesn't have foreskin? Thats like being bald, which Conway will also soon be. Conway should just go and buy himself a bike seat to sit on whnever he is at home or work (Those are the only 2 places he ever is) so that he will become impotent and won't have the burden of trying to pick up girls, or the burden of callousing up his right hand before the baseball season from 'fagging off.' It's called fagging off because when you cum, you are holding a guys dink in your hand and looking at a big hard cock. If thats not gay, then Bute has no idea what gay is. This of course does not stop Bute from going fag pretty much every day. Bute feels that being able to make yourself cum is probably the single greatest accomplishment that anyone has ever made. 70 home run is okay, but Bonds should have fagged off while rounding the basses, or at least left the game after the bomb and fagged off in the clubby. If Bute or Conway were in the show and a stud, they would pull off between every inning. If you're not doing it at least 5 times a week then you're doing a dis-service to yourself and might as well kill yourself or just cutting it off and giving it to some broad who doesn't have one.

Conway was conisdering getting all over Bute for a small write-up, but realized how inappropriate it would have been after he re-read his own article. If Conway wants to get the site back on track then he better step up his game. He knows that Bute relies on him and can't do it without him, and let's not forget that Bute wouldn't even wake up in the morning if he had never met Conway so the entire site depends on Conway clutching up. When Conway says this, he actually means the complete opposite, as the whole site depends on Bute and what he's going to do with it when it goes independent. Whenever Conway rapes Bute on this site, it's usually him taking out his own grief for himself on Sunny Bute. Conway is so jealous of Bute that Bute can't even comprehend. Because of this, Conway re-directs his self-loathing on Bute. Conway has absolutely no self esteem or self respect and has absolutley no dignity. Conway has no morals, no values and whatever amount of talent he had was gap to gapped out of him by Vancouver in Kamloops and the middle of Richmond's line up. Conway has absolutely no clue what he wants to do with his life and has no direction whatsoever. Conway will probly move into the boat at some point in the summer until he runs out of money then has to scrape his 'life' together and move back home and go back to work. Conway thinks this is when Bute's phone is going overboard.

Please, get something new to whine about. Anyone who knows Bute knows he's the cheapest man on the planet. If their is anyone who would not have his life effected by becoming a bum it would be Bute. On the PMBL site ticker, they wish everyone a merry christmas and so on. Get a ****ing clue. What possible reason is there to do this? Why even try to be nice to people? And on the same note if people need other people to be nice to them then those people should just end their insecure lives. If you can't survive by yourself in a gutter in Samalia then you shouldn't be alive at all. Everyone should have to spend a year (at least) of their lives as a bum with nothing so they can know what it's like to hit rock bottom. Bute was looking at some photos of when he had his boat on stilts in the spring. It brought back some fond memories for Bute. Bute would like to invite Conway to do whatever it takes to ruin Butes life again so that Bute and Conway can once again be on the same page. Step up COnway, Bute needs to be taken down a notch.

Cheap people are disgusting. That's exactly what Bute is: cheap and disgusting. If Bute had a pimp heater then it wouldn't break. Bute's 5-Large that's sitting in the bank is doing nobody any good. Go do something with it. Go buy a ****ing car so you can drive yourself somewhere besides the suicide store on granville and 3rd.
The $12 heater from liquidation world lived a half life and failed Bute. Bute shouldn't be bitter cause the only thing he's ever done is fail others also. So Bute would be a hyprocrit if he hates his broken heater. He could have originally put that $12 into a better heater and would still be able to see his **** and balls in the morning. Conway prefers that all uninvited visitors of this site have ****ed off because Conway doesn't want any others to know what his life consists of. No one else is big club enough to know what happens in Conway's life and almost everyone are to small club to know what goes down with Bute. Conway will probly remain single for the rest of his life ever since he has become way to big club for himself to comprehend. Conway understands the fact that all girls that are in the same league as Conway's club are way too hot for Conway. The only thing Conway can believe is that these hot tramps will be blown away by how big club Conway is. Conway knows this won't happen so he'll probly just move into Bute's life and take it over when he 'goes away.' If you can't figure out what that means then...nevermind, whatever, I'm not explaining anything to anyone. **** it, I'm out.

Butes heater on the boat breaks over night and Bute wakes up shivering as it was -2 degrees inside the boat. Bute thought about buying a new heater but what would be the point. Why would Bute want to improve his life? Bute still doesn't no where he will play this summer as his old lady will soon be single. Figure it out. Bute got high with the crazy french security gaurd who was going to try out for the Canadians last year and was going to get Bute a try out too so Bute shouldn't worry about who his contact is. Bute obviously provided none of the weed as is his normal practice when it comes to smoking up with friends. If your a friend of Butes then you know that Bute is a cheap lonely man who takes every opportunity to mooch off everyone he knows. Why wouldn't he mooch? If there is any chance at getting free stuff Bute is the guy to be there. The key is getting things for free even when they are not intended to be free. Like free subs 10 days in a row from the campus caf at BCIT. Bute wouldn't even try to hide the fact he was borrowing the subs, Bute would just walk straight out the door with the subs in hand. Lets remember who we're talking about here.

Conway watches tv. He goes to the Women's Network. He sees Eric Hinske talking bout ball gloves. Conway puts the controller down. Hinke talks about glove types and selections to 2 cute broads. A woman takes over the narrating of the show to let it be known that she is the host and begins to tell the viewers how to work in a mit. Conway gets up and leaves the room.

Please... This is The Rick Squid, not a gossip column in the newspaper, nor is it an online journal. There is no picture of Rona Raskin on this site either. So let's just leave it at that. If the girl that Bute obviously didn't have time for consumed so much of his time that there was no time for The Rick Squid, then Bute obviously didn't have his priorities in order. Conway, on the other hand, can't wait to get a girlfriend so he can hurry up and get dumped. Conway may try and pull a Costanza and not answer his phone or never be home so it can be a delayed break-up, but that would be for getting under her skin, as the relationship would be so fast that that's the only thing he will have time to get under. Now that Bute has re-evaluated his life just in time for pre-season, he will now have the time to bat .333 and share in the feeling of turning down Dave Laing for the midsummer classic. Besides other personal reasons, why would Conway and Bute want to represent the league in any way. Conway isn't sure why he went to the provincials to represent the pmbl...maybe cause they finished 2nd and couldn't win a game with out him in Trail. Conway's got nothing else half decent to say today so he'll end with: Bute is a worthless ****.

Conway will be hapy to hear that Bute took a large step toward returning to his pathetic life yesterday. Bute has his girlfriends car and was supposed to pick her up from work. Bute decided to fall asleep at his brothers house instead and leave his old lady waiting at the casino for over an hour. When Bute finally woke up he had 14 missed calls, nearing his personal best that happened just a few weeks earlier from the god father himself. Bute then phoned his lady friend to find out she got her brother to come get her instead and wanted nothing to do with Bute. Bute then drove her car to her dads house, where she was staying, and left the car in the driveway with the keys on the seat and walked in the freezing cold at 11 pm to the skytrain and then spent the night alone in his -5 degree boat. Bute assumes that his short lived relationship with this much hotter broad has come to an end. Bute will be suprised if he recieves a phone call from the girl. On a positive note this will leave more time for gambling, updating the site, and playing flips starting next week.

Bute now gives something for Conway to look forward to: A soon to be re-acquired dead end life(pun intended). Conway makes Bute's mind up for him for where he will be playing this upcoming season. If these 2 big club ballplayers are going to drop close to a combined 10 bills at pro-stock then they might as well play flips together every weekend with some hack-flips players. So Bute wants Conway to move out. That might be difficult to do considering he plans on buying a '92 caddy deville sometime in the summer. This wouldn't be a complicated matter if Conway's boss didn't batman him this past Friday on payday. If Conway doesn't get paid or even a phone call by this Friday then he plans on kidnapping his boss' son on the weekend. Plan B is to pull a 'carnie' as seen on The Simpsons and fully take over his boss' house as if it was his own. Plan C is to just burn his house down with his entire family stuck in the ****ing inferno. Bute's role will be important in any of these plans as he will either be 'the voice' in the kidnapping, Conway's wingman in the house takeover, or board up the doors and windows in the arsen job. Conway favours plan C as it would be the best story over a pitcher and a handful of peanuts downtown. Either way, Conway will achieve some form of redemption and obviously work Bute into the equation and give him a big league role in some kind of takeover. Since no one else checks this site anymore, Conway is not worried about sharing his plans to settle his boss' debt. On a side-note Conway's plan D was to kidnap the daughter of his boss and **** $600 out of her, however her mother is a 230lb-half native-35 year old-disgusting woman who has had 2 kids with Conway's boss. This lead Conway to think that ****ing $600 out of her would take roughly 3 years and the end of her toddler years. In conclusion, Conway will use plan D as an extreme back up plan, and if Bute wants he can factor himself in to plan D if he aspires to do so.

When is Conway going to step up and re-examine his own life. Maybe if Conway didn't drop 2 bills on a hotel room downtown just so he could spend 6 hours in a bed thats not next door to his parents room, then he could actually afford to move out of his brother and his double bunk-beds and find himself a life worth living. Conway does however make Bute take a closer look at his life. Bute does in-fact miss those days in the spring of being un-employed, homeless, and closer to the end than ever before. One point Conway forgot to mention was that Butes old cat, now dead cat, lived on the boat with Bute while it was on stilts in some guys yard. The cat would climb the ladder every few days to come and get food and see if Bute had ended his life yet. No such luck. Conway should realize that it won't be long untill Bute returns to a life that matches his previous low in life. In fact Bute would predict that within the next 6 months there will no doubt be a huge reversal of Butes furtunes. On a closing note Bute would like to remind Conway that Bute had sex last night while Conway hasn't been laid in well over 4 months. Of course if anyone has seen the guys face they will know that this is just the begining of a much longer drought.

Bute asks for a write up from Conway. What he really needs is a reality check. Conway wanted to put Bute back in his place this weekend with an other 6 pitchers and 18 missed calls, but little old Bute gets told that he has to work the whole weekend. Maybe if Bute could scrape up a weekday of free time Conway would tell his boss to go **** himself and give himself a day off and drink all day with Bute. This would be perfect for Conway to tell Bute how much better he was when he was at rock bottom in the spring. There was once a time when Bute lived on a broken-down boat on stilts at his sister's boyfriend's cousin's fiancee's house off the bypass as he had no job and couldn't make contact in the cage if his cat's life depended on it. This was also the time when Conway caught Bute looking on the inside corner with a spring training fast ball and an outside curve ball that was swung through in the initial and only intrasquad game of the pathetic pmbl season. However, if making contact in the cage would save the cat's life then he would probly go by-you on purpose so he'd save the $4.75 a week on cat food since that kind of money matters to Bute. In other words, you're pathetic Bute.

The site counter has been stuck at close to 6000 for the last month due to the lack of Butes participation. This clearly shows that Conway can't even carry his own socks to the laundry room that is located next to his parents bedroom which is located next to Conways lack-of-a-life. Bute will do a write-up whenever Bute feels like doing a write-up. Bute was busy doing a write-up on his girlfriends back for the last 3 weeks and that is why Bute has been AWOL on the site. In conclusion **** all of you and your families. It is clear that Bute has lost any talent that he once had. In fact Bute shouldn't have even done this write-up because it wasted everyones time. Bute doesn't care though, he does however care that he is wasting Conways time because as we all know Bute lives in the shadow of Conway, who lives in the shadow of himself.

Holy **** Bute, figure out your life. Throw away your brutal phone and do a ****ing write up already. You are so gay Bute. Either end yourself or do a write up, the option is yours.

Bute talks about Conway's contempt for his own money. This is a fantastic call by Bute...Of course it's by Bute, who else could have said it. [Conway gets furious at the columnist.] Conway doesn't understand how Bute goes from his worst write-up ever a few friday's ago when Conway had to lie about his internet being down for having no reply, to his previous write-up. Conway has a difficult time showing interest in doing a write-up when he knows that Bute's write-ups are as consistent as Ryan Swan, Jason McKee, Mike Somers, and Brody Anderson are at the plate. Sometimes Bute is as bush as Kyle Van Veen is with his cigarette pack. However, on a positive side, even though Bute obviously doesn't deserve one or have one, his appearances at his part-time Job are more frequent than an appearance by Craig Van Veen on the mound. One other thing that Bute has in common with an Angel is that him and Chris Dowsely are kindrid spirits: what is she doing with him? That's all that Bute deserves, he should feel blessed with anything by Conway and his tax-evading dad's keyboard.

If Conway is just now realizing that he shouldn't waste his time on Sunny Bute then maybe Conway needs to figure out how to light a match because every other person who has ever met Bute has figured that out within 7 seconds of meeting the guy. And maybe Bute would be making daily appearances if his old man was ALSO a tax cheat that pulled in over 200 large a year and paid for Bute's internet, roof, food, life, and of course bail from a semi-mexican prison somewhere in southern Hell, also known as Arizona. Conway showed Bute just how much more big league he is than Bute or anyone else Bute will ever know, see, talk-to, or have any dealings with by staying in the Fairmont hotel (Best hotel in Vancouver) after getting lost in downtown Vancouver. Conway showed his complete contempt for his own money by shelling out over 2 bills for the room. Bute can't comprehend this as Bute wouldn't pay 200 beans to save the life of his own mother. For anyone reading who's mother has passed away and feels that Bute is a ****ing asshole and doesn't know what he is talking about, Bute thinks you should get the **** off this site and go visit your mom at the cemetary as no one invited you. Bute couldn't care less about any of you and especially about any of your families. Bute hopes you all go to hell very soon, especially the entire Conway clan. This has to be one of the most pathetic families ever concieved by man. The whole family needs to climb into a giant fish net and bail on their lives. Why bother getting up in the morning if your last name is Conway? And how does Rich Conway not see this comming and get born into a decent family. Have some fore-sight meat. You think Bute would have been born as one of those starving babies in Africa? No ****ing way. Bute would have just choosen not to be born at all, as there would have never been a chance to do this write-up because Bute would have had aids and every other disgusting disease known to man. Bute wouldn't donate the 50 cents it would cost for the bullet to use to end their ****ty lives. Bute feels they should suffer for being born into that life.

Conway just wrote a piece for the site but then he realized that Bute didn't deserve to read what Conway wrote so he erased it. Also, Bute only makes an APP 4 times a week so he might not have read it until wednesday. Bute's Ticker update gets erased by Conway as it mentioned something about Bute being big league. Conway is done wasting his time discussing Sunny Bute.

So Bute does one write-up and packs it in...Hey Bute, this is a full-time job meat! Conway will proceed to write nothing but garbage until Bute can re-figure out his life. He goes from rock bottom to sub-average and thinks he's too good for the site. Conway is in Mark's today to shop for dad as he is getting helped by some blonde european broad. As usual Conway has nothing good to say as he has an extremely lacking personality. He talks to her and she goes from interested to GET THE HELL OUT OF MY STORE! Conway then proceeds to his bedroom where he wallowed for an hour and re-evaluated his meaningless existence. Conway considered looking to a friend for some consolidation when he remembered that he doesn't have any. Then he considered dumping himself in the pitt river covered in a fishing net and a plastic bag over his head but then realized that Bute wanted to go first. So after all of this contemplation Conway can do nothing to cheer himself up (death counts), cause it's not like there is an other dedicated writer for the site who would be able to give Conway a semi-meaningful laugh...Maybe Kittleson would come back if he was begged. Conway would probly get a write-up out of Kit a lot quicker then that other guy who has forgotten his roots.

Bute does nothing but make excuses and exceptions in his life. So Bute thinks he will light up Conway. **** me, Bute can't even light a match. Conway wanted to tell Bute about the raise he got at work. But Bute would probly hang up on Conway halfway through the news. Then, Conway would phone back, thinking there was a bad connection or something and little to Conway's dismay, Bute blocks Conway from ever calling him again. Then Conway would drive out to The Mad-piece to figure **** out and more to Conway's dismay, Bute closed up shop and moved his locale because he found an other dock for only $297 a month. To Bute, a $3 saving is worth it no matter what percent it is to the total sum. Conway had no idea what went wrong in the aquaintainceship and ponders it for over a month. Conway receives an email explaining everything. When Conway was at Bute's boat in the summer he didn't wipe his feet before entering the livingroom and Bute has been holding a grudge for the past 4 months and just finally decided to snap about it. Conway, in no way, wants to borrow anything from Bute. Conway is amazed that Bute came out of his selfish hole to offer something, however it came with obvious fear of Conway possibly lending it out and not getting it back as was the case with the New Balance shoes lended to Conway in the summer. Conway just realized that there are no more outside viewers of the site so there will be no references to any inside jokes and happenings as this is an inside site. And Besides, Bute knows the jacket wouldn't be necessary as it's well known that Conway would just run after a little girl, tackle her into a fence, punch her in the face until she's unconscious, or until her jaw is lieing on the ground and can't yell anymore, chuck her through the done-up window on the tail-gate of the burb and proceed to the alouette where she is discarded of tidely. After Conway gets cancelled on to see Ocean's 12, he calls someone else, to find out that it's extremely mediocre and can't even be called 'Not as big club as oceans 11,' because that would be assuming that it was a little big club. He heard the movie was dog****. And it will be more dog**** because the cheap skate will go see it at famous players intead of silvercity, personal reasons obviously weren't involved in the decision. Conway isn't sure if Bute knows what big club is anymore. Here's a clue: it has nothing to do with saving 92 cents. Here's another: taking all of the mints and toothpicks from a restaurant avoiding a future purchase at anywhere but Safeway is definitely not big club. Grow up and get some sack Bute.

Bute doesn't have much to say either, except that Conway has let this web site, and especially his life, fall apart in the 3 days that Bute found something else to live for other than hearing Conways voice on the phone. Even though it is still one of the best parts of Butes day when the Ex-convict phones Bute to recieve some re-assuarance that life is NOT worth living, Bute gave Conway the batman today by not answering his call. Bute was busy shaking off some year-and-a-half-old dust that needed to go like Bute and Conways lives need to go. If you don't know what Bute is talking about then feel free to ask Bute for a sail ride, Bute has plenty of spare anchors for you to tie to your legs and end what you call a life. It looks to Bute as though Conway didn't even give an effort to keep this site going over the last few days, Butes not sure what will happen to Conways life when Bute leaves town for good. (And by leave town, Figure it out!). Conway should also forget about buying fastball in a can and go to the GAP and pick up some generic personality in a can if he ever wants a broad to talk to him again. Either that or start hanging around the elementry schools of Pitt Meadows again, handing out candy and wearing an over-sized trench coat. Bute will lend Conway his if Conway wants. Its not sure why Conway gives a **** about Bute doing a write-up, Conway cares less about Bute than he does about the under aged hook-piece he took out to Picktons farm last winter. Plus Conway seems to be able to do Butes write-ups for him. If Conway thinks for a minute he can hold his own life together without Bute around Conway is the biggest joke on the planet. And in fairness to every other person on the planet Conway is still the biggest joke around (Bute is a close second)even with Bute holding his hand after all these years. With that in mind Bute is not sure what Conway will do this upcomming ball season (Besides gettin lit-up by every stick in the league).

Conway doesn't have much to say. Well, he could say lots, but it would be 98% garbage: something that his life consists of. Besides that, he went to the mall on Monday and weighed in on the 25c scale in the washroom. He weighed in at 180lbs. Conway thinks this is pretty decent since he was nearly 210 in his fresh-fall at SI and 175 a little over a year ago when he was spending some quality time with 50 other societal wrong-do'ers and couldn't bench anywhere in the vicinity of 100lbs, but that's beside the point. The point is that Bute is constantly rubbing it in Conway's face that he has a broad and Conway does not. Conway plans on changing this. The only thing holding him back is there being way too many dirty girls out there that Conway wants nothing to do with and the fact that he enjoys his loner ways. Conway isn't sure why anyone would want something to do with these tramps. It's pretty basic that these girls are trying to see how loose they can get and have bets with their friends to see who's labia sags the most.

Bute changes his voice mail and had confidence in its nature. However, when Bute woke up in the morning he realized that he made the biggest mistake of his life and understands that it would be small club to change it back to what it was before. Bute is sure that Conway is outraged with this sudden change, however Bute thinks that Conway will let it go with his sudden wave of road-pieces....Girls you ****ing idiot. Bute is very confident that Conway will be jealous of what Bute is pulling that he'll want to join Bute and maybe want to be more like Bute when he sees what kind of broads that he will hook Conway up with. Conway is probly jealous that Bute is out of town this weekend and won't be able to hear his voice. Conway was seconds from asking to tag along for the trip. **** you Conway, it was obvious. But why wouldn't Conway want to tag along with Bute? Although Bute is a pathetic individual, he is still way more big club than Conway and Conway fully knows this even though it pains him to think about it. If Conway doesn't step up his league, Bute is considering to Batman him.

Conway wasn't sure when he read the most recent write-up, before this soon-to-be piece of ****, who wrote it. But then he figured out that he could care less who wrote it and will not be stuck in the present(he prefers the past when he was a better looking man and a better ball player). This is assumed because Conway doesn't consider himself a ball player anymore. From what he was to what he is, something is gone. He went to London Drugs the other day to try to find 'fastball in a can' for the upcoming season, however they were sold out because of Lidge being in town to visit Walker to discuss the DS. For any of you who still check out this dominating site, even though you don't have the permission, it's a lock that you have no clue what was just said. With that in mind, too many things are going over your head and it's obvious that you can't keep up. Conway believes a hot/not update is required as he is currently maintaining a rating of 8.6 with 150 votes. It's assumed that Bute is outraged by what girls' standards are these days to go ahead and be way to leniant towards Conway. On an other note, it's fairly weird that Bute doesn't do a write-up for 2 days because Conway had no aspirations of following Bute's far to bland Friday write-up. Seriously, Conway didn't even work that Friday and refused to give Bute the time of day. All he could do is lie to Bute about his internet being down. What a load of ****, Conway is far to big league to let his internet be down. Figure it out Bute, you can't do this without Conway. Who's 'coat-tales' are being rode?
Seriously, what could be said about Bute's Friday write-up? He goes into immediate predictability with the chit-chat tale that Conway regrets reading twice. Conway assumed that Bute rushed to the library to get something quick down. Bute knows what Conway thinks about quick write-ups. Conway is so sure of this, he believes that Bute will know what DWMT will stand for as it was said just last week as Bute considered doing a quickie... And then, Bute goes to his way too predictable line about Conway's ugliness. There's a time and a place and Bute obviously showed up half an hour late at the wrong venue.

Hey Bute and Conway, pull your ****in worthless lives together. You two are the biggest bunch of jokes on the internet/planet. You're both such pathetic losers that there is no way this site should go more than 1 day without an update. Bute I'll start with you: Learn how to tell a decent story, you don't have the word punchline in your vocabulary, and probably not even the word vocabulary. Also no one else cares about what girl shot you down today, or what pitcher the Twins re-signed to a two year deal, or what time high tide is, or that you have a bunch of soft-cock tattoos. Get a ****ing life!! As for you Conway, not much else needs to be said except that yor an ugly ****in asshole. Try leaving the 'town' of Maple Ridge one time this year, try not riding Bute's coat-tales every chance you get, and please oh please DO try ending your worthless life tonight. Just ****ing die asshole!! Both of you!

Bute wakes up this morning and has a bagel for breakfast as he does every morning. Bute then headed off to school. He walked to the skytrain and then got a bus from metro town. IS THIS THE CHIT-CHAT YOU WANT CONWAY? Why would Bute waste his time or Conways (as he is the only other person invited to be on this site or than Bute)with ignorant meaningless chit-chat. This is another case of Conway and his lack of clutchness. Conway makes a superb call when talking about people that live at home having roommates/parents. Bute obviously didn't need to rewrite it though. ****. Butes bad, clearly could have just refered to it. Once again Butes not gunna go back and fix anything. Bute decides he is going to buy Conway a large mirror for christmas so Conway has a constant reminder of how useless his life is, and will always be. Butes only regret about this write-up is that by having the sarcastic chit-chat at the start, Bute falls into what Conway was talking about. ****. You Conway

Could Bute force the issue anymore. If someone who could actually understand what Conway and Bute have going here then they would know what Bute just did. Usually Bute flows from bull**** chit-chat into telling Conway why he's so worthless, which is great reading. With his last write-up there was no foreplay involved whatsoever. I guess it's understandable, Bute couldn't even give a definition of the word, nor could he exemplify what it means. Bute can't even lick his way through an icecream cone not to mention a girl. On a date Bute had last week, her and Bute step outside into the cold night. Bute goes to put on his gloves and his massive hands break right through the fingers. As the broad was watching this unfold she got really scared of what her future had in store and ran off crying. But this is nothing too major as Bute as scarred far more women in his lifetime. Sure Conway has clutched up with a few moments, but Bute can say that he makes atleast one girl cry a month. Just look at the parasites he goes to school with. Conway is pretty certain that there are some people there that surprise their parents/roommates by getting up in the morning to brush his or her teeth. The parent/roommate is so surprised because they spent all day making a noose for them and making sure it's on their bed by the time they got to bed, however it's assumed that the individual that the noose was made for either didn't make the connection or couldn't figure out how to use it. After all, they are going to BCIT....Gimme a break, I hope the job rates for BCIT grad(not plural) is less than 5% because there's no way Bute should getta job, let alone anyone else. If my kid had a hunch-back then I would have given him a 'How to' suicide book for his 10th birthday cause there's no way I'd let any of my friends and family know that I have such a repulsive son.

Conway needs to learn something about clutch performances. Even though Conway has at times during his life come up with something that resembles clutchness, it was by pure accident. Past inncidents include: Having a girlfriend, Getting a scholly (Figure it out) to go to the states for ball, being friends with Bute. These are the only such occasions that Bute can think of involving both Conway and Clutchness. Bute on the other hand is comming up with clutch performances everyday. For Bute, getting up in the morning is a clutch performance because no one expects Bute to be around tomorrow. Anyone who knows Bute goes to bed thinking that that was the last day that Bute would be a part of the ****ty human species. Bute feels that is the reason why so many people that know Bute are able to sleep at night: becasue the terrible burden of having Bute as a part of their civilization is finally over. If Conway wants to come up with a decent reply to this cloumn Conway will have to dig so far into his bag of **** that he may not even be able to get out to write a much needed column. Back to Conway and his huge lack of clutchness. Bute remembers a time when Conway had something to live for. It was not long ago in fact. Conway had finished his 2nd season on Dougy and was set to go to one of the best Ju-Co (FIO) programs in North America. Just 3 years later (Now) Conway is living in his parents attic, putting cat food on a shelf at work, and begging the A&W girl for free cheese on his mamma burger. Conway may have the ability to be clutch, but the rest of us have yet to see it shine through. Go **** Yourself Conway!

Ok lets stop joking around and get serious. Conway and Bute don't want you to check out The Squid anymore. Listen to the top of the page and follow orders given to you. It's plain and simple: YOU'RE NOT INVITED TO THIS SITE ANYMORE! Save yourself the time and erase this site from you favourites. Conway and Bute totally don't want any of you to look at it anymore. If you're thinking to yourself, 'they can't be refering to me,' well you, and everyone else are who is being refered to here, EVERYONE. This site is now strictly meant for the 2 writers of the site. Conway and Bute would rather shutdown the site before they write another word if they knew that some of you still come here. This is 100% serious. You shouldn't even be reading this sentence because they don't want you on here anymore. If you are still reading this write-up then you obviously can't move on so you should obviously think of a fashionably way to kill yourself....just like what Bute is probly doing at this very moment.

The Ticker updates get retired to the very unappropriate Roster section. What, do you think you were getting put on the Roster? You know that you're not good enough to be put on the Roster so get over it.

Conway is so different from Bute. For instance, he doesn't have to tell the world about his 2nd write-up of the day. Hey Bute, no one cares about you doing a 2nd write-up. All they care about is what's in it. Bute shouldn't have even mentioned this fact, he should have just put it up and erased his earlier and very mediocre write-up. A month ago it was possible that it could have passed as good material, however, now that there is a new level of quality gold its label will stick like a sock in the morning after a night of Bute jerking off and using it for clean up. Conway took no notice to how much he got all over Bute in his last write-up, however he was amazed, at the same time disgruntled at how much Bute got all over Conway. This doesn't affect the hatred the two have for eachother. Seriously, Conway is fully aware of his facial features so he doesn't need an update every other paragraph on The Squid. Let's face it, all it takes is a mirror and Conway's got his update. Conway doesn't believe in transitions in his write-ups so don't expect one now. Conway thinks it's pretty basic that Bute has to make a 2nd appearance out of the pen for some short-relief against the A&W girl. Conway would fully dose up and hand over the keys to the burb so he can get the job done on her 15 minute break. With this in mind, it's also pretty basic that once she's back on shift, she's gonna hear about it from Conway until she freaks out and gets fired and has her life temporary ruined in all thanks to the founders of The Rick. However, it might turn out to be a little more permanent when she figures out that Bute's condom 'accidentally' had a hole in it.

Bute is forced to do a second write-up on this the 30th of November. What prompts this spontanious column update is the call of Bute and Conways dads somehow being 'old currling buddies.' Butes dad would not go near any member of the pathetic clan that is the 'Conways.' Even the name Conway implies a dirty, parasitic thief (CON-WAY), therefore Bute is caught be suprise when Conway refers to the Bute family as a bunch of thieves. On a side note, the two Bute brothers are just that,(Thieves) but that is beside the point. Conway is the last person on the planet that needs to tell Bute how ****ed up Butes mother is. Bute knows this like he knows how to make himself blow in under 30 seconds. Conways dad is so ashamed of his far lesser son that he won't even let this eye-sore go near the family business that pays for Conways upstairs bedroom that is located across the hall from his parents so that when they start hitting it Conway can listen in on something he'll never experience again in his lonely life. (Get a longer sentance!) Because of this Conway is forced to work 2 jobs (Showing people where the ketchup is located, and raking their lawns after they find the ketchup) in order to scrape enough cash together to get his new jeans hemmed at below the belt. this, along with still living at home, and having a younger ex-girlfriend, is just more proof that Conway has yet to, and probably never will, grow the **** up! Bute is gunna knock your teeth out you ugly ****!

So what if Conway would have been devastated if Bute wouldn't have approved of his hair. Conway knew Bute would approve. Conway knows that Bute thinks the world of Conway. Even though they aren't friends nor acquaintances, Bute still looks for that father figure that he never had in Conway. Someone that could smack him around after a night at the bar. Days of father-son panhandling on the corner of 3rd and main. Times where they would con people out of there money just as in Matchstick Men. No one knows why Bute is this ****ed up that he has to do such a thing. It's assumed that it was passed from his 'mom.' The quotations were used because everyone knows that Bute's mom was no mother to Bute or her other son. Mrs. Mountain has no clue what it's like to be a mom and she's so ****ed up right now she might as well be dead. Once again, Bute and Conway ARE NOT FRIENDS! Their dad's are old curling buddies and force the two untouchable flips players to hang out once a month. What Bute doesn't understand is that he might as well drop out of school because he's obviously not going to get any kind of respectable job. He might as well come work for Conway where he might get some kind of enjoyment in his day. Conway thinks Bute's school is the only motivation he has to get up everyday and do write-ups. Without school Bute would have probly done his life-long expectation months ago.

Lets not kid ourselves here. Conway had been spending the last 2 months in preparation for his and Butes flip game on sunday. Conway would have been devistated if Bute hadn't given full approval to Conways new look of long(ish) hair. Bute is under the opinion that Conway jerked off when he got home, not because of his great new hair, but because Bute approved of the great new hair. Conway 'lives' his 'life' strictly to impress Bute. The quotations around 'lives' and 'life' are due to the fact that Conways 'life' barely qualifies as any sort of meaningful existence, and because by 'living' Bute means that COnway gets up and goes to work and comes home and goes to sleep and then repeats the proccess. Bute understands well this cycle of uselessness as he is currently trapped in his own spiraling wasteland of a life. That is not the issue however as this write-up is about Conway and his flaws. Pointing out flaws in Conways existence is like pointing out Darrells while walking through the mall, or like pointing out 15 year old girls that Bute is 'Way In' on while also walking through the mall.

Conway wasn't exactly sure how Bute felt about Conway's hair. He knew there was some admiration going on but its level was unknown. It was still unknown after reading Bute's write-up. However, Bute went all-in and layed everything on the table when he took it to the Countdown feature on the best thing in all of your lives.
If it was 4 months ago then there would be a write-up on the flips that took place on the 'more bitter than Bute's dad for marrying Bute's mom' Sunday afternoon. As Bute tends to do, he didn't hold anything back and clearly let the A&W broad know that she was 'way to good for [her] job.' However, a feeling of shame fell over Bute as the food court lady found his mass pile of onions under his tray as they were thrown all over the table. It was a great downfall after Bute let the owner of an obviously worthless dog know that the dog hated its life. The owner replied with 'hey guys' and was left with no reply from Conway and Bute as the pathetic 'man' and his dog of no value knew what it was like to get big leagued.

Conway goes way over the line with his last write-up... By mentioning the name Mitch Graves on this site twice in the same millenium Conway has brought down the level of this site and the level of his own site preformance to a certain ex-columnists level. Conway does pimp the entire universe by growing his hair out and looking like Edward Norton in American History X, except not being nearly as bad-ass, though almost as prejudice. Bute couldn't get off Conways nuts about it yesterday. This is the first time in Conways life that someone else has thought Conway had a superior element than the guy comparing himself to Conway. Conway needs to take some pictures of his hair right now so the next time he goes to get it cut he can take the photos and not say one word to the barber, just hand the high school drop-out the picture of himself.

Apparently Bute didn't like the Mitch Graves reminder of the ball pants to class day. Well maybe he'll like the reminder of when Graves wore a sweater that was knit by his G-ma and thought it was a bad-ass sweat-piece.
Conway fully realizes that Bute figured it out and stepped his game back up to Conway's level. The only problem is that Bute is a week late and is slamming Conway into the ground just like a fence post that he does at work with his new stud foreman. Conway enjoys his new foreman, he's so dreamy... So Bute gets disgruntled when the focus is taken from him and put elsewhere. No one is sure why Bute is trying to be so egocentric. It's not like he got similar attention from his mom when he was a worthless little kid(refer to the archives). The only attention Bute got was when his mom took out her bondage belt, after feeding it to his dad, and beat any kind of future out of the asshole. And when that didn't work, she obviously strapped it on and bent Bute over the bathroom sink. This is the only logical explanation of Bute's muddle views towards women.

Conway, News flash: Figure It Out! Conway needs to get off his new foremans happy sack for two minutes and focus on his write-up. Conway starts strong by insulting Bute, who is an extremely easy target so it's nothing special from Conway. But then Conway decides that he is going to give the rest of us a guided tour of his work dugout. This is one of the little league dugouts with an entrance only at one end of the dugout (This is a metaphor meaning Conway is stuck in his job for the rest of his life). Also it is one of the dugouts with cheap chicken wire in case there is a foul ball hit toward Conway. Conway who is usually so big club has decided to set up camp in this super small club dugout and hope no other human being discovers this waste of life living in a shed disguised as a life.

Now that Conway can get a word in he can discuss how he controls 4 of the 5 Ticker highlights, and this is just a short while after Conway referred to it as the Bute Ticker. Conway comes out from the gross hole he lives in and took command of the Ticker. Bute may take this as a challenge to him to raise his game up a level. Conway doesn't care how Bute takes it, Conway doesn't even care about Bute. Why would he? No one else does. It's not like Conway is going to step up to the plate and care about the guy when no one else gives a flying-**** about the loser.
Conway gets a new foreman at work. This guy is so big club that Conway feels honoured to be given the time of day by the most big club person that Conway is affiliated with. Conway would probly lick his bum if he asked him to. On the other hand, Conway's equal at work is so small club that he goes home on Wednesday at 1pm because it was raining too hard and he was wet. WOW!...so small club...even more small club than Mitchell Graves. Ball pants to class doesn't compare to this ass-clown. If this guy knew who he was getting compared to then it's pretty certain that he would end his life in a hurry. In such a hurry that he wouldn't put any flare in to it, just quick and easy, not like how Bute will do it because Bute believes that if you're gonna do something then do it right...suicide.

Conway finally figures out who's running this site. On a side note Bute gets shot down by some broad at school. Bute asks her if she wants to grab a beer at the campus pub. The girl in question reply’s with, “Actually I’m really busy all week with school, but maybe another time.” Who the **** does this girl think she’s talking to? Bute doesn’t need it to be sugar coated. Bute has already had to deal with some of the most disgustingly disappointing moments this world has to offer. Some broad shooting Bute down isn’t gunna make his life any worse. On that note Bute would rather of had the girl tell him to **** off and call Bute a douche bag. Bute could have at least held some respect for the girl then. As it is Bute is sour for ever asking out a girl that wouldn’t use this opportunity to big club Bute. If this broad was indeed honest about “another time” Bute can’t wait for the opportunity to big club her like no one has big clubbed anyone since Bute was left to die alone in a gutter somewhere. Bute is still far too sour to talk of this incident at any length. Bute has given you plenty of clues as to how his life became the most worthless thing to ever come out of Terrace B.C.

Conway will do something totally opposite to Bute when he recognizes gold...not a ****ing thing...nice work.

Conway needs to take a page out of those D3 JC's and throw his life into the trash folder. Making the call on carebears.com was by far the best he can stive for. On that note Conway should pull a Constanza and leave on a high note. Conway has moved from living in the past to living in a future that will never happen. After throwing his first inning of the upcomming season Conway will walk back to the dugout and start talking about how he will dominate the league NEXT YEAR. Bute prefers living in the past as it gives no possibility of massive dissapointment. Conway on the other hand is a life long dissapointment to everyone he knows, especially his parents. Nobody could honestly be happy about spawning a child that is so disgustingly unsightly to look at; someone who will never be loved by another human being; someone who threw away any chance at a decent life; someone who is the emphasis of all the worst that his parents have to offer in themselves. Conway is Danny Devito in 'Twins,' (Obviously it wasn't going to be any longer before Bute made mention of the movie with such a great title) he is all the worst parts of his parents clumped together to form a 7th rate humen being. Go **** yourself Conway!

Bute avoids a raging phone call from Conway by posting a later than usual write-up. Also, Bute is right, he knows he's right. Conway does live in the past. And he is also right when he explains the reasoning for doing so. Bute right when he says that he has improved muchly. Let's not forget his play at Douglas College, if you can even call it that. Just the same with Conway, out of high school there was no way in hell he could have gone ANYWHERE in the states. D3 JC's would easily throw his emails in their trash folder. However, from then on he now has something that he can call a curve ball and a change-piece. Also, the deucer doesn't really factor into the equation when he only picks up a ball 3 times in the month of April, something that will require a change.
Bute didn't know what he was doing when he was thinking that he could come up with something better for the Ticker. When it's said that if the Ticker doesn't change for an other month it's not like it's a horrendous assumption. The Ticker is gold and if you aren't realizing this then you should obviously go check out www.carebears.com because you obviously need to take off the diaper and training wheels and g


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