Spaceballs: The 2015 Season Begins
Posted April 28, 2015
Excitement and a little rain filled the air as a new season began for Spaceballs: The defending Division 3B Champs...or was it Division 4?...old age rots the brain, kids. Stay young and slutty. There it is. The first of many sexual references this season.
Opening day was also Drunken Monkey's birthday. Opening later that night was Drunken Monkey for the Injured Ginger. It wasn't his beers she was opening for him either.....wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
The damp weather didn't dampen any spirits at the ballpark. The team was excited for the new season, but that excitement translated into a few early game mistakes that Fowl Balls capitalized on, jumping out to an 8-1 lead by the top of the fourth inning. The bats started to wake up in the bottom of the fourth and, with two outs in the bottom of the fifth and the tying run already across the plate, Donaskroob decided to take matters into his own hands and rob Drunken Monkey of a chance for a game-winning birthday hit by ignoring the third base coach and running home. He was thrown out and the game ended in a tie. This reporter doesn't want to insinuate that between the base-running error and and earlier missed fly ball that Donaskroob cost the team the game, so he'll just come right out and say it....Donaskroob totally cost the team the game. He'll have a lot to make up for next week. Whether he makes it up in the field, at the plate, orally, rectally, or other holey is yet to be determined.
The momentum that started late in the first game was carried over into the second, powered by a four hit, five RBI performance by Princess Vespa and a ginger-solid pitching performance by the best licker of Tims you'll ever see.
Already looking forward to next week!
Gunner's Mate First Class, Phillip Asshole